Suburban Liberals Provide Grades for Virtual Signaling

The Society for Concerned Suburban Citizens has come up with an easy guide to help the neighbors in their communities understand how effective a virtual signaler they are. Jan Hagmore, President of the Society for Concerned Citizens in Princeton, NJ said, “Many of us are not sure how to rate our level of concern and commitment to causes that show how good and moral we are. This scale will help us improve over time by aspiring to a better grade.”

The easy to follow scale is below:

F Grade: Live and let live attitude. Donate to a church or other non-profit that helps in local community without fanfare. Does not know or care what their neighbors’ political affiliation is.

D Grade: Fly’s pride or peace flag. Brags about working with people of different races and being their “friends.” Has “Coexist” bumper sticker on car. Makes fun of Trump supporters behind their backs to fellow D-graders. Calls for social distancing and stay at home orders except when protesting how bad America is.

C Grade: Everything from D grade plus; keeps “Hate Has No Home Here” yard sign, attends at least one protest, participates in Chick-fil-A and Tucker Carlson boycotts, will only watch MSNBC and CNN. Openly sneers at Trump supporters. Only associates with like-minded neighbors and family members.

B Grade: Everything on C grade plus; keys cars with Trump bumper stickers, openly supports everything that Trump is against including the Chinese Communist Party, MS 13, sanctuary cities, tearing down of historical monuments, social media speech restrictions, the United Nations, and the rule of law. Makes fun of people that believe in God. Sends kids to the most liberal colleges and has school window sticker on electric car.

A Grade: Everything on B grade in addition to; flies American or thin blue line flag upside down, bows to members of different races to show remorse, actually believes AOC is right about most things, openly sneers at church goers and is an active member of the Twitter mob. Protests along side rioters and has been known to supply a few rocks or bricks if needed. Has been arrested for protesting at least once. Volunteers to be a member of the community patrol once local police force is defunded.

Ms. Hagmore said, “We hope this grade scale will help people know where they stand and where they can improve. Often times it is hard to know given we work and live in safe work spaces and gated communities.”

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