Search

Hollywood Identifies New Joker for Upcoming Batman Flick


Hollywood has been in search for the new Joker to carry on a long-standing tradition of sinister characters dating back 30 years or more. Rumors have surfaced that they are close to signing a contract with Vice President Kamala Harris. Speaking off the record, a Hollywood insider said in a written statement, “Kamala would be perfect for the role based on the following reasons:

  • She identifies as a woman. Joe Biden recently said that, ‘Women can do everything men can do,’ so this allows us to break the tradition that the Joker can only be a man.

  • Her laugh. It is a nervous cackle that is a combination of crazy, sinister and criminal. Perfect for the Joker role.

  • She can read off a script. Like most actors, Kamala is not the brightest bulb in the bunch, but she has demonstrated she can read prepared lines. Like the President, she goes nowhere without a script, but unlike Mr. Biden, she can follow one. We will provide the witty script; she just needs to read and laugh like she does every time she talks in public.”

We had been wondering what was taking Ms. Harris’s time away from her important assignment of fixing the border crisis. A job assigned her by the President over two weeks ago. We now know that she must have been reading scripts and negotiating contracts. We understand that the border is not a crisis to our current administration and the media, but just a seasonal problem. (It seems tens of thousands of people want to beat the heat of summer) thus giving her time to work on more important issues like acting roles.


Will she carry on the tradition of previous Jokers being the sinister foil to Batman? One indication she will give a great performance comes from a sub-contractor currently working on the 70,000 square foot Vice Presidential mansion that is being renovated. Under assurances of anonymity, he said “She has been a raving lunatic. Constantly badgering myself and the other workers. It’s hard to understand her sometimes with her laugh but I think she is upset that we are not working fast enough and the crew does not have enough women. I can’t wait until this job is finished.”


Heartlanders feel the same way. We can’t wait for her job to be finished as well. Unfortunately, we think her next role will be that of President. The only one laughing then will be Kamala.



HeartlandNews.net has your back. We will speak truth to power and challenge political correctness and doublespeak. Please consider subscribing. You can also find us at https://heartlandsensibilities.locals.com/

25 views0 comments

Recent Posts

See All
 

Subscribe Form

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • LinkedIn

©2020 by Heartland News. Proudly created with Wix.com