Biden Reportedly to Take Bold Action Against China

Anonymous sources close to the Biden Administration have hinted that the President is about to take bold action against China. Reports suggest that Biden will shake his finger and call them publicly a “lying dog-faced pony soldier.” This action was prompted by evidence linking China to recent hacking of Microsoft Exchange and millions of computers worldwide.

This action proposed by Biden comes on the heels of many Chinese misdeeds. Below is a partial list of the Chinese government’s misbehavior over the last several years:

  • The accidental release of the human altered COVID-19 virus from the Wuhan lab.

  • Forced organ harvesting without consent.

  • Torture of Falun Gong practitioners and Uyghur Muslims. Including rape and murder.

  • Stealing of intellectual property from US and European industry.

  • The manufacturing and exporting of Fentanyl contributing to the US Opioid crisis and significant overdose deaths.

  • Slave labor to support global supply chains and manufacturing.

A quick review of the above and it is easy to see why the President must take such bold action. It is rumored that other tough measures were also considered by the US and Europe:

  • Spanking Chinese college students and spying professors involved in stealing research.

  • Giving a 30-minute time out to Chinese diplomats.

  • Making executives from Disney, Coca-Cola, Google, Apple, NBA, and hundreds of other companies write on the blackboard “I will not do business with the Chinese Communists anymore” 100 times.

  • Taking away internet troll privileges for two weeks.

A source close to the White House said off the record: “The president means business this time. He is not happy being pulled off the biggest issues of our day; fighting climate change, stomping out white supremacy and creating a diverse and inclusive military.”

The source also said, “Unlike the previous administration, this is how you take bold and decisive action on the world stage.”

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